To Be What It Needs To Be

I don't really know what I am doing here. Now, this is not some massive metaphysical quandary I am speaking of, but this blog. I had thought to delete every entry in here today and start again in the hopes of making it, for once and for all, what I want it to be. But there are two issues with that. The first being that I don't really know what I want to do with this little corner of cyberspace that I have declared as my own. I had thought the quotes a fantastic idea, and I still believe that I was able to really delve deep in some cases, taking from a few simple words a wealth of meaning. My hope was also to help  give inspiration to others who may have been struggling, who needed a little bit of encouragement or another way to look at something and I can only pray that in some way I was successful. However, this effort also left me feeling like I was somehow getting the short end of the stick sometimes. Instead of freely writing about what was naturally flowing within me, I was always busy trying to find words spoken by other people to try and make sense of my own tangled thoughts. The problem with doing this is that I am bypassing my own reflections to some degree because they are NOT my words that I am breaking apart to find meaning but the thoughts, feelings and opinions of another mind. Yes, I can relate to those inspirations and I can pull strength from them when my mind is grasping for something to hold on to but ultimately, to truly be able to call this space mine, these have to be my thoughts, my words, my feelings and opinions.  The second reason I have decided not to delete all posting up to this point is because it just seems like an awful waste of time, energy and thought. I may have started the entries with quotes contributed to other people but that was not what the entire blog posting was about. They were all how I  tried to interpreted these quotes into my own life and circumstances.  And so, no matter which direction this blog takes, I will leave those writings for they are a part of where I was at that particular moment in time. There is no reason that the topics and styles of the blog can't change and evolve with me, because the purpose is and always has been ME. These are my thoughts, my insights and admissions no matter if I am showing them by the quote I chose one day to break apart and interpret or the manner of letting my mind wander as I am now, letting the writing become fluid and letting it be what it needs to be. I am a work in progress, and so too shall this space be.

Namaste